Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Randomize
