I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
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