drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
