ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
