I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Randomize
