But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
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