she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
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my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
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