very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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