That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
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