I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
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he confused my yawn for an orgasm
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
I currently don't understand fingers.
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