You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
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