I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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