thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
no, he came in my armpit
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
