We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
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