After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
there is puke in my bra ... again
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