Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
