it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Randomize
