ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
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