He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
