am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
