I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
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