So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
