Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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