you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
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