I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I have already put on my inside pants.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
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