so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
false alarm. still invincible.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
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our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
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hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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