So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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