12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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