awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Also, beer. Big fan.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
