Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
