last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
