Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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