they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
