Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
