Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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