Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
