people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize