for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
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