dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
So much rum. So many feels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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