mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
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