he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Randomize
