he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
My day in three words: secret purse cake
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
Randomize
