Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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