She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
can u get pink eye on your cock?
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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