I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
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