I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Randomize
