guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
