If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
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