we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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