Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
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