He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Randomize